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And even

And even if you treat those parents in whom the ideas stated above caused emotional discharge and simplification, can quite test some doubts concerning a rationality of all this.That is the cornerstone such doubts?Why transfer of responsibility to the child is so difficult for performance?We believe that we understand, why discussion of opportunity to grant to the child the right to make mistakes can create such difficulties and even to frighten you.We think, so occurs because you seek to be the good parent, meaning by it approximately following: It is my duty to look after that my son or my daughter normally developed and behaved quite definitely.

On what not without

You and your child in the future Now you already read and, perhaps, practically worked everything that was it is told in this book how it is possible to treat your child differently.On what not without the bases you can count after master and will pass the program offered you?As most likely will react to everything this is your child?In all the recommendations we proceeded from the assumption that in future, say, years through ten you would like to have the good relationship with your child.Very possibly, what exactly and will be, if you did that we recommended in this book even if to you it was necessary to pass through everything, including the fifth step from chapter !

While other

Nevertheless, in three years Amanta was timid.Especially in an unfamiliar environment.At a playground where we left, Amanta with big caution decided to depart at last from me and to play with other children.While other children carefree froliced, Amanta sat at my feet, watching the events with fear and surprise.Other mothers looked at me with pity and sympathy.It is easy to guess that the thought of kindergarten could hardly cause delight in Amanta.Therefore we with the husband began conversations about a garden in good time.

However the happiness

Behind this car matichesk followed social life and formation ha rakter.So as a result the child not only became happy, on also began the activities for formation in itself a forehead centuries.However the happiness is not the only purpose of an obr zovaniye.The person has to possess independent character and abilities to be ready to work and a sovershenstvova niya in all that depends on it.In such light the childhood since the moment when arises appears at us the consciousness also starts everything controlling.

Spasms of organs

So, the child speaks, words flow a stream as suddenly this stream sharply stops as though its ways are followed by an insuperable barrier, and at once in departments of organs of articulation proiznositelny, respiratory, voice there is a series of movements the most various on the external manifestations.These movements are involuntary, the child cannot control them.Spasms of organs of articulation the most characteristic, typical symptom of stutter also belong to such movements.In a form speech spasms happen clonic and tonic.

Now we can understand

By means of love of people will also be able to unite everything, that he creates the hands and reason.Without it everything that it created as it often happens, will bring only chaos and a razrusha niya.Without it, with increase of its power, anything to it at the appropriate will not remain, everything will collapse.Now we can understand words sacred: Without love all anything.Love it is more, than the electricity lighting our darkness, than the radio waves transferring our voices through the space is, more, than any of energiya, which person opened and which learned to use.

Water children

But is air, liking either to jump from where or to climb somewhere, fiery with them it is necessary to make fire that they did not do it more often, there are also water.Water children very much like to bathe, lap, dive constantly and infinitely to frighten by it adults.Therefore we at dachas have very strict law: a step to water without adult it for children.But if the child asked to dip himself in the river you have to leave all and desire to execute him it for the adult.Water children look for still all the time an occasion to wet hands, boots and other clothes.

This family

The family is capable and it has to appear between it and the hostile world, protect it and save his consciousness from splitting, from painful division.This family failed, did not protect the young consciousness did not sustain, broke up.Psychosurgery Less all psychological assistance and psychotherapy resemble surgery: and ways of impact on an illness, and degree of danger of mental disorders to human life all this is, as a rule, incomparable.However there are cases when circumstances compel also the psychotherapist to work so resolutely that becomes clear: not such our bloodless occupation; it is necessary to cut sometimes on live, without anesthesia.

There it is possible

In this country Day of your birth is constantly celebrated, to you are always glad, and all play games which you want to play.There show movies where you can get on the screen and to become the participant of an adventure.There are trees on which spaghettis together with sauce grow.There it is possible to meet chocolate plants, candy flowers, and bushes on which it is possible to grow up anything.In this country there is a huge platform for games where you can play any game what can only come to your mind.

The speech

One children in four years have a speech already absolutely pure, another manage not all, but in general the pronunciation improves.At fouryear age the monological speech arises, but really the child masters a monologue by five years.Five years are an important stage in development of the little person.The speech of the fiveyearold child is various, substantial, colourful.He can already attentively listen to adults, analyze and establish relationships of cause and effect.The phrase becomes more developed and competent.


And also persistently resists changes in the habitual schedule.Our children fitting this definition had moderate and heavy degrees of autism.My experience with children with heavy autism showed that ethological approach supervision over behavior of the child is extremely useful.It is convincingly confirmed also by Tinbergen, and, later, John Richer.Especially I was interested by the concept of behavior approach / distance at the child with autism.It is possible to see obviously how the child avoids social interaction.

There is one more

Because linear concept of Ewo p, trying to explain a divergence of types with pomo iin.it ideas of adaptation and heredity, and also aspiration I eat to a sovsrshetgstvo, more insufficiently.There is one more and and not simple aspiration to a survival, and aspiration to .mopiya?combining general efforts thus, they work for achievement of a common goal.And in the child besides the vital aspiration To be formed and reach perfection has to be still one pel, a natural duty, something that it has to To do I in service to a whole.

The majority

We reach before that at all we do not hear it and instead we develop at ourselves a habit to concentrate attention to information, arriving to us from the outside that with its help to direct the behavior.The majority of ideas of that, properly to arrive to the good to the parent, just also are those; they proceed from society, but not from you, not from your own common sense.Ignoring of the internal voice is so standard that becomes a habit, and the person becomes capable to hear and care about that is necessary for other people, but does not hear and does not pay attention on own needs and requirements.


This assurance should be repeated repeatedly.Everyday ordinary situations, such as leaving of the child under supervision of the babysitter, can provoke at it fear that the parent will never return.Sometimes the child can be calmed, having told him where you are going to go and having left phone number on which he can call.Sometimes it seems to children that divorce happened on their fault.The child can think that his disobedience compelled the father to leave the house, or that mother and the father dispersed because argued on his bad behavior much.

This idea

They say that during this period the child starts imitating life.This idea in itself not it is new because always say about children that they imitate senior.But this very superficial remark.Today on nyatno that before starting imitating, it is necessary for the child first of all to understand.According to old representations, all, that is required from adults it to behave usually, and children, imitating them, will grow and will do also.On it our responsibility came to an end.

We We can watch

They were also found in alluvial deposits, Brought by water from mountain tops.Undoubtedly, it were The th Ghanaians of animals who helped to create the land.We We can watch them this occupation and now on myriads the orallovy islands growing as if flowers, on obshir ny ocean open spaces.These remains autographs of army in of ilmyapny builders which prepared revival World and period of its destruction.Number of new proofs and researches constantly gt II.The form of a terrestrial surface cannot be attributed innp, to work of a wind and water, it is necessary to add to it vnieeipennoye influence of animals, plants and person.


Any could think that this child the Hindu, has to be, inherited such love to animals.Other child attracted with this scene approached, saw an ant, stepped on him and crushed.This the second the child was the Muslim.Christian child, perhaps, would arrive also or would pass indifferently by.Also was is quite admissible to think that feeling of a barrier between The convincing proof to it is provided in the book: Ruth Benedict.Patterns of Culture.New York, Iodmi and animals from whom the belief that follows shchobv and mercies deserve only people, is still One example of heredity.

Paris, English

It was shown the Dutch biologist De Friz, and we find parallels to it in psychological development of the child the fact, Gezell forward to the book: The Embryology of Behaviour.New York and Lon don, hard J.M., Dr.Rapports et Memoires sur le Savage de l'Aveyron, 'idiotie et la Surdi mutite.Paris, English translation: George and Muriel Humphrey, New York, Cen tury, convincing us that a human nature of everything I isdut to the general laws of life.It follows from this that maturing is something bigger, than the simple sum of influence of the genes operating in it is limited the ny period of time , as, besides influence of genes, there is an influence of environment, according to They act with Gory.

All children

What did Anton tell at school?In what mood Anton came from school?Than Anton was proud?Whether Anton's act opened?This year we decided to celebrate my birthday in McDonald's.I invited five friends.On a holiday table there was a lot of tasty food.We ordered fishburger, chisburger, maknaggetsa, ice cream, Coca.All were full.And still showed us the whole representation.All children made different numbers.All of us won prizes, and I received a great lot of excellent gifts.

And than

They for a long time will remain in your memory, and what you did, you will feel is unique prekrasno.You can imagine now as you get up and do that you nuzhno.And than to you should be engaged, you can imagine that perform the work with pleasure.It is so remarkable!And it is so joyful to know that will be so good.!Perhaps, I will draw something after that told Endrea thoughtfully.Also I will make it with pleasure.And I will play the riddle Annie told.I now see myself behind this game.

When the lexicon

For example, the word drink can designate a request to give a cup, to give juice etc.And since one and a half years the kid uses the offers consisting of two words: I want lyat I want to walk.When the lexicon of the child reaches on average words, the number of phrases increases at once.However in most cases the kid builds phrases incorrectly, without pretexts and the unions, and it is difficult to understand some offers.By the end of the second year of life in the active dictionary of the kid words which it uses already words.

When the child

Discuss and decide together how to make such campaigns safe for physical and sincere health.If these conditions are not met a penalty house arrest very effectively.When the child understands and children quickly understand it that you are not going to stop his initiative, what not against researches of the world, but simply are concerned about his / her safety the child will not revolt.It is better to transfer all the rest from the serious and instructive plan in a game form.For example, insist especially as the child usually not against that took with itself the mobile phone even can agree as often you contact, for example each minutes.

He sat down

The fly came across to a spider a lunch.The spider to production began to bustle.The spider by a lunch hurries.The spider line shakes, the fly tries to depart.Yes only from a spider line to it not to escape.Than the spider is occupied?Who got to a spider line?What does the fly do?Alyosha had a tasty cake.He sat down at a window and began to eat.Suddenly hears, behind a window noise.Alyosha in a window looked and there the big car passed.

Hold your

We anyway mentioned all these ideas in the previous heads, so they will not be absolutely new to you.Consider them one now for another to bring itself into the corresponding state of mind before to address to concrete instructions on persistence development, which will be stated in three following heads.Hold your purposes in consciousness Experiencing difficulties in the relations between you and your child, remember in what your main goal consists.You want: To be happier.


But often she did not manage to make it.Annie madly was afraid that if she will take to herself to the house one of the girlfriends, the father can come drunk and start shouting in all throat, to brawl, and, in general, to behave as mad.Annie thought that if such happens she will simply die on the spot with shame.Therefore she never brought nobody home.Of course, it is difficult to find friends when you cannot invite anybody to yourself, but Annie considered that it is better not to have friends at all, than all the time to shake with fear that someone from them will come and will see her father when it cannot stand on nogakh.

And now answer

Correctly mother told.And now answer me such question: if two boys approached you and one of them would look so mother Annie smiled and looked her in eyes, and another here so and she stooped and looked down with what of them you would prefer to play?Of course with the first Annie told.With what smiled and to which, apparently, I was pleasant.Yes mother told.I think that most of people would agree with you.She kept silent for about a minute.Now it continued I am going to ask you very important question, and I am sure that you will be able to answer it.

To a question: Who with

Then there is an exchange of delicacies or all this turns into one general entertainment, the general pleasure.Here one more tasty game, it is called vinaigrette.To a question: Who with whom is ready to divide a meal?, there are groups of children and parents.On one person from each group it is invited to a table on which sacks with unknown food lie: candies, mocheny garlic, lemon, melon slice … The essence in that, fading to be able to divide both a tasty, and tasteless fate.And to be glad to the unexpected.

Even on this, later, Kevin's behavior

But I never gave in and carried out its wish, only if he tells I.The Rigidnost weakened it, and some months later he started speaking about himself in the first person, and always, and not just in the musical room.Even on this, later, Kevin's behavior indicated stages by times certain conflicts or problems which he faced at home.At such moments he could choose a form of a tacit protest against communication, for example avoided to look in the face, was disconnected and became reserved.Nevertheless, despite the resistance to changes and manipulative behavior, Kevin showed versatile musical abilities.

It is possible

The parental power, no doubt, has to have the rights and levers of influence, differently in a family the chaos and anarchy from what as shows experiment, also disturbers of tranquillity children suffer will set in.Still experience testifies: if to be guided by the principle of the equal rights and presumptions of innocence, it is possible to construct fair relationship and in separately taken family.It is possible to make so that the home did not seem to the child a torture chamber.The third superfluous Ordinary family: mother, father and daughter.

They need

It is necessary to give to children not one opportunity to find out a situation with both parents: to ask them questions and to talk about the feelings.They need to give time to digest the created situation, to adapt to it.Do not think that one informal conversation will be enough to resolve all problems.Sometimes it is difficult for child to put the thoughts and feelings into words.In such cases it is recommended to induce it to it through occupations by needlework, game in puppet theater or telling of stories.


Breathe do not breathe.Sitting on a chair, we take a deep breath, we hold the breath for seconds and strongly we pull in stomach muscles, then we relax and it is slowly exhaled.Drum.Sitting on a chair, we take a deep breath, thus the stomach is stuck out the belly wall rises, we hold the breath for seconds and times slightly we hit ourselves on a tummy, then we relax and is slowly exhaled.Inflatable ball.Sitting on a chair, we put palms to ourselves on a stomach, we take a breath and we feel how ball is inflated, then slowly we exhale and we help a ball to be blown off, slightly pressing palms a stomach.

For example, why the teacher

Let the child know the rights and is able to stand for them it too finding of force.And internal force it basis of its safety.Small, but important addition: before taking measures, help the child osmys to pour what he faced.Help it to get rid of anger, not to nurse a grievance, to see the events from other point of view.For example, why the teacher swears?Because was tired because you regularly do not prepare lessons because.It, eventually, too the person, and her patience is not boundless.

Thus the greatest

Therefore names of forms of leaves need to be entered by means of the usual concepts.Application: in the yard or on walk to collect leaves, and then to dry them under a press.Thus the greatest interest children show most often in the fall when leaves are painted in different colors; various games on ordering of collected leaves; ordering is carried out taking into account a form, size, color, similarity, contrast, shades, edges and a streak leaves.Children have to choose rules of ordering as perhaps independently; comparison of leaves with figures inserts from biological komoda.

Such is the highest

perev.Nevertheless you should not count that academic the manager the deniye will turn on this attention: dispassionateness, completely justified with rules which do not give the chance about to show any interest in psychological problems, and allow to organize only educational process and about to drive examinations.Handed over them gain the diploma or the scientist degree.Such is the highest top which reached in on shi days the higher education.Meanwhile researchers, dealing with social problems, find out that graduates of schools and higher education institutions are not prepared for life and, except that, their ability to useful participation in life is reduced societies.


Two circumstances affected that we stopped on this last point of view.Despite all the wild statements, Andy never and to nobody put real damage.Dogs whom it beat and it did it not by a fist, and a palm, were big and strong and did not look intimidated.Having grabbed cat, Andy ran so that he could be stopped before he could actually to throw it through a fence.As for a windshield cars, it broke it not purposely, and most likely is casual in the course the incident which is not connected with this glass.

The absorbing

Such is the child!Be it differently, the mankind would not reach stability in uniform part of the globe; the civilization could not to carry out the continuous development, if every time it had to begin all over again.The absorbing reason forms a basis of society, is created foot the person, and we see him in appearances mild malen whom the child who resolves incomprehensible difficulties mankind thanks to gift of love.Having studied the child it is better, than we did it still, we let's open love in all its manifestations.

Let's begin

Let's begin again we clap ourselves on knees: It seems marvel, marvel two times make a helpless gesture Oliver Twist, Twist two times we show on ourselves, Cannot neither sit down, nor sit down we stand up two times and we sit down, Cannot neither rise, nor rise we get up two times and we sit down, To clap, in palms we clap two times.Let's begin again, again we clap ourselves on knees two times: It seems marvel, marvel, marvel three times make a helpless gesture Oliver Twist, Twist, Twist three times we show on ourselves, Cannot neither sit down, nor sit down, sit down we stand up three times and we sit down, Cannot neither rise, nor rise, rise we get up three times and we sit down, To clap, in palms, in palms we clap three times.

It is very

Do not execute for failures.It is very important.Failures happen at everyone and if too strongly for it to reproach the child, he will cease to believe that at him it will turn out.He will feel the helplessness and will wave on himself and the habit a hand: I smoke?Well and good!All the same at me it will not turn out.Understand together why the child broke, think how to make that more such did not occur.Teach the child to study on mistakes and on failure to look as at annoying incident which repeats less frequently.

It gave

But, probably, the biggest talent of the donator allocated Maksimilian Voloshin in due time.It gave not only subjects, spaces, the sea, acquaintance with each other, the world of meetings of different people, but the acceptance gave much the whole warehouse of destiny or its sudden turn.Marina Tsvetaeva wrote about what thanks to Voloshin's openness and those surprising stone and sea months which she spent at it, she gained the openness to people which put further its poetic frontage to the world in its most difficult years.

It reminds

Each stage of the creative and and in has this dual nature.Fight, fear some Failure can have incalculable consequences, as I and Mitch on these obstacles is absorbed by consciousness in the same lopi as positive results of progress.It reminds Vtnechatok on a photographic plate who is turning out in re silt i, pussycats of dispersion of a light stream which is shown and I, i house subsequent picture.Thus, during this period Y we galkivatsya by I not only with usual formation harak sh, but also with possible formation certain it is time lump of development or deviations of the personality which will appear ii.


Providing love of this sort to the child the most important that you can to make for it or for it.And in a sense you already did all this for many years.Regardless of that, your experiences apropos are how negative at present, you would have no child of any relations with it at all or with it if in their basis there would be no initial care of others as people.However and this type of love can be hidden at parents behind others in the ways of behavior connected mainly with any duties.Therefore we will tell you, properly to show such love in relation to your child.


Collecting information, keep in mind that teenagers take great pain to diminish the experience!What to do The main thing to find out that pushed the teenager that became a provocative factor for it, and to take measures according to it.Learned?Now it is necessary to find alternative option of a solution.For example, if the person was forced persuaded, it is necessary to strengthen character: to fulfill skills of refusal, that is ability to tell in time is not present!I do not want!

However the frustration

The main frustration arising at patients with schizophrenia is ambivalence, a duality of motives, emotions, perceptions, thoughts the word, that in the ordinary speech is called as split personality.The classical psychiatry believes that the nature of schizophrenia is exclusively endogenous that is it is generated by the internal reasons.However the frustration similar endogenous, arise and mentally healthy people during the crisis periods have lives.Similarity of the mental disorders peculiar to teenage age, to the schizophrenic was noticed by many psychologists and psychopathologists.

Your daughter

I thought of distance and I want to look as far as was it is exact.Your daughter Marcia already several times for the last half an hour tried to enter in a bathroom and every time noticed that all of you still there.Mother that you there you do?at last she speaks nearly for the first time she asked you, why you so long take a bath.I take a foamy bath and I eat an omelet with popcorn which I to myself made, you speak.All this a little mentally ill people acts; we ask you to make them it is more and to develop actually at itself a habit to do them it is constant.

Let's nod the head. For performance

Then in one of days

However awareness of own helplessness convinced her to try something other, and it gradually and first simply began to apply approach to test, which we describe in this book.Then in one of days at the beginning of July of business, it seems, looked black absolutely.As it was told in chapter , so happens quite often.Karl and his friend were detained by police and placed in insulator for minor offenders that the burning threw crackers in the passing cars.By this time Mrs.

It is clear

otmechatsya, should address to the pediatrician, the neuropathologist, and if it is required, these doctors will direct the child to other experts the children's psychiatrist, the psychologist, the necessary course will be appointed.Treatment of neurotic states has to be complex.Components of this complex: psychotherapy, medicamentous therapy, and in some cases physical therapy.It is clear that medicamentous therapy is appointed individually to each child and only by the doctor.Phytogenesis preparations are enough for someone the same valerian, mint peppery or lemon, a St.

You will

And in general as it it cannot stick together a hare!It after all such nonsense!And here all attempts to solve a problem are crossed out by one phrase: You have hands hooks.You will not consult!Here I never such was!Than further our childhood leaves us, especially ideal we seem to ourselves.And liked to study, and always listened to parents, and the grandmother was helped, and were accurate, and simply pleased with themselves the whole world.And if we recognize that after all were not ideal, with the reservation: time was another.

I can muffle

I represent as it is beautiful mother Endrea told.I represent as it is beautiful mother Annie told and began to continue the story: Mother Endrea asked: Interestingly, and what your carpet to the touch.Smooth and silky or soft and fluffy?Cold, how sheets, or warm, how blanket?Likely, it causes in you pleasant feelings?.My carpet warm and woolly told Endrea.I can muffle in it.And my convenient and cozy Annie told.I can curl under it up.


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  • Water children
  • The absorbing
  • Collecting
  • It gave
  • Spasms of organs
  • Let's nod the head. For performance
  • Despite
  • The speech
  • Therefore
  • This idea